New Relationships

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living together, spending habits, debt

It's tougher than it looks.

One of the top reasons relationships fail is MONEY. This can be hard to believe when you're newly in love and life is bright with roses and sunshine. But it turns out that the longer a relationship lasts, the more likely money problems can cause strife - sadly sometimes to the end of the relationship itself. The good news is that this tragic cause of relationship failure can often be prevented by integrating good financial habits together from the beginning of a new relationship.

A new relationship offers the opportunity to set patterns - good or bad - that will set into place the trajectory of your future together. While budgeting and financial management may not be the most tender topic of pillow talk (is it between accountants newly in love?) your relationship's odds of enduring on can only be strengthened by addressing your finances before and as things get serious.

It is quite rare to find two people with exactly the same financial management methods, and a new romance can inspire more indulgent spending at first that isn't a realistic indicator of either individual's usual spending habits, and the indulgent spending also isn't sustainable for many people in the long term. 

As you discuss and cultivate your dreams, goals, and plans for the future together, make sure to discuss the essential backbone of all those lovely things which is finances. Here are some points to discuss and plan together:

  • What is each of your spending habits? Discuss similarities and differences. It can be tempting to gloss over your bad habits, but dishonesty about spending in a relationship can be the road to breaking up in the future so make it a good habit to be honest about your spending habits with your partner and ask of them the same. 
  • What debts does each of you carry? What is your plan to pay them? 
  • What assets does each of you have? This discussion comes up naturally when one partner or another owns the property they live in, but it's worthwhile to know about each other's financial standing and assets are part of that.
  • Do you want to combine finances or keep them separate? Many couples nowadays operate somewhere in the middle, keeping some accounts, debts and assets separate, combining others.
  • Consider meeting together with a financial planner either at a bank or another reputable financial advisory. 
  • Discuss who will be in charge of what expenses and savings.
  • Work on a family budget once you are living together and commit to reviewing and sticking to it.
  • If you don't plan to live together in the near term but you do intend to travel together or share other significant expenses, then conversations about budgeting and finances will still be beneficial for the health and longevity of your relationship.

Learn More: 

Finding Common Ground 

Getting Married